Sexuality and Disability

My Story

Pregnant By Choice

I'm a 32-year-old woman, disabled since birth, and until recently I have been firmly in the closet. I have been living in the nondisabled world all my life... I completed college, then graduate school. I am a full time professional. I have been married eight years to a non-disabled person...And yet, here are these braces. This limp. This ostomy appliance. These stares in the supermarket. All remind me that, while I live among the non-disabled, I remain on the margins. I remain Other. I was born with a congenital defect of the lower spine called sacral agenesis. This means that my sacrum is mostly missing -- where "normal" folks have vertebrae, I have a mass of soft tissue...

Gliding Through Life

Though some disabled people strive for able-bodiedness through the search for a cure...many of us embrace our queer bodies and feel better in our skin by doing so. This is true for me; as I decided at the age of fifteen to begin to use a wheelchair despite my mother's decry that I "would never live a normal life" if I did not walk.I stopped talking because I went through a cycle of several fractures stemming from having brittle bones and a femur and double tibia rodding surgery that kept me bed-ridden for about six months. It exhausted my mental health and I decided walking was not worth the psychological cost...

Questions

Question1 Can my disability get in the way of me feeling sexual?
That depends on how your impairment affects your body and mind. It takes energy to explore your body and feel sexual, Read more on Can my disability get in the way of me feeling sexual?

Question2 What if my partner starts thinking that I am a burden on him?
Asks counsellor Jyotti Savla from Mumbai: 'Are you anticipating this situation, or are you getting hints which have led to this fear? Read more on What if my partner starts thinking that I am a burden on him?

Question3 My husband is also disabled. He refuses to have a child because he thinks I will start ignoring him. What do I do?
Try and think for a moment why he may feel this way. Does he think that your love for him will decrease? That you will no longer spend time together? Read more on My husband is also disabled. He refuses to have a child because he thinks I will start ignoring him. What do I do?