Not a China Glass

‘Barry was a tetra [quadriplegic]. He had married the nurse who had taken care of him… He told us that there is more to a sexual relationship than just an orgasm. A loving relationship between partners, even if one of them is paralysed, also naturally consists of foreplay, touching, stroking, kissing and hugging. He told us that when you are paralysed, at first it seems unlikely that you will be able to have any sexual relationship with anyone. This thought is a distressing and worrying one. However, you may have to modify or change some of the sexual activities, and you can still have a meaningful sex life and continue to be sexually active…

On retiring to bed, it felt good to have private moments with Sarosh and sharing close intimacies. For the first time after my accident, it was lovely lying in bed with our arms around each other, and sharing moments that we couldn’t have in the hospital surroundings with no privacy at all. It was sweet to taste the pleasure of preliminary sex, and I egged Sarosh on to greater intimacy than he felt we could manage, as he was prone to treat me like China glass ever since my accident.’

Shanoor Forbes, 67, quadriplegic